Tired

You know when you work so hard to do something great and you just fail? Like studying for two hours for a quiz, then getting a 62% on it. If it happens once, you think OK this only happened one time that’s OK. I’ll do better next time. But when it happens more than once you start thinking why do I even try anymore? Is it even worth the battle? Then, you start to slack off. Just the thought of the class is enough to give you a small anxiety attack.

I’m tired of, and from, getting only six hours of sleep or less a night; it’s hard to sleep when you’ve got the trio of anxiety, stress, and depression standing over you all the time. I’m tired of sitting alone at lunch, being last pick (especially at something I’m actually good at), voluntarily being a group of one so I don’t have to have the embarrassment of not having a partner, working so hard for nothing, and masking my emotions. It’s all exhausting.

Anyway, it’s Halloween. I spent my time sleeping instead of carving pumpkins or handing out candy. But I found a neat trick: If you have a food item that’s just been sitting on your counter for weeks, trick-or-treaters will take it. I had several bottles of sparkling water left that I hated; I put four of them on my porch with a note, “Take one.” Ten minutes later, they were gone. Maybe I’ll give out some of my homework assignments next year and claim I never got a copy.

Because it’s Halloween, here is one of my favorite SNL sketches called Matt Foley: A Scary Story on Halloween: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/matt-foley-on-halloween/3505917?snl=1

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